April 17:
I started the day confident and feeling like a bit like an attorney.
It didn't take long though, to realize that perhaps I should go to law school before endeavoring again to engage in semi-intelligent arguing. I left the experience feeling disappointed and a bit stupid.
Luckily I enjoyed the talks at church today and felt inspired by this story of the hidden wedges that one of the speakers shared.
"Where do hidden wedges originate? Some come from unresolved disputes, which lead to ill feelings, followed by remorse and regret. Others find their beginnings in disappointments, jealousies, arguments, and imagined hurts. We must solve them—lay them to rest and not leave them to canker, fester, and ultimately destroy."
The issue that I was arguing has been ongoing for a couple months now and I just need to realize that it's not going to be resolved the way I hoped it would. One person still holds way too many cards in this situation (and it ain't me). At least, though, concessions are finally being made. I have to acknowledge that it is what it is and I need to make efforts to remove the wedge of bitterness (at feeling like this issue is being left only partially resolved) from my own life. Me continuing to beat what has clearly become a dead horse is not hurting the horse a bit. I'm the one needlessly expending energy and effort where it has ceased to be effective.
And with that I will curse the stinking federal government one last time for robbing us blind this tax season and bid you a good {wedg(i)e free} night.
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2 comments:
I'm sorry, Lara. I've been there in my own individual circumstances. I'm glad though that you are finding that help in talks and such. I have a hard time with partially resolved things too (ie. for me that's resolved on the other end and totally not on mine-- talk about beating a horse--.) But there's only so much control anyone has and there's a favorite scripture of mine that talks about not allowing a ravenous wolf in and when I talk with my kids I always share with them how we should not allow those wolves in to destroy our peace. And I'm not talking about people here-- I'm talking about our own feelings of bitterness, envy, pride so on and so forth. It's tough.
So I enjoy reading your writings and enjoy learning that you also enjoy hiking. I'd love to learn more about some of your favorite hikes (we've explored a few near your area). We're not as hardcore as we only go between 2-5 miles a hike (I have a one year old who likes to usually hike one of the miles and a 3 year old who'll troop along the whole way.) But I love the outdoors and my kids do too as we can be found hiking several times a week. Great for sanity and fits in perfectly with our homeschool too.
~Melissa
Ahhhhh. We've all been there. Different circumstances, different people, never fun. Stressful and difficult to let it go, always. Good luck!
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