Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Shoe-ly I'm Not That Daft...

I have friends whose shoe collections rival the racks at Payless.  On any given day, whether they be buying formula at the grocery store or raking their leaves; they look cute.  Their shoes match their handbags, which match their outfit, which match their car seat covers, which match their kitchen towels.  It's amazing. 

I, on the other hand, own approximately 4 pairs of shoes--2 of which are tennis shoes, which is approximately 16 fewer pairs than my brother has.   I guess most days I feel lucky that I've showered and taken off my pajamas, so I never even think about what I put on my feet.   Combine that with the fact that I hate to shop and you've got a good glimpse into my complete and total footwear indifference.  

I first began to get a clue that I may have a footwear problem back when I was in college and I was a bridesmaid in a wedding where a pair of high heels was purchased for me to wear.  At first I was excited to enter the upper echelons of fashiondom and add an extra couple inches to my puniness.  However, it did not take long before it was abundantly clear to everyone in the wedding party that I had never owned a pair of heels before.  The bride's mother only scolded me a little for stumbling in the expensive dress and immediately traded the shoes in for some boring old flats, which, by the way, I still own 17 years later. 

I remember another time at an Enrichment Night where they had everyone gather in a circle and take off one shoe to place in the middle for some kind of get-to-know-you game.  No one had too hard of a time tracking me down, as mine was the only turquoise running shoe in the midst of cute black or brown loafers.   

Normally my anti-shoe fetish doesn't bother me much, but every once in a while after one of these embarrassing experiences I  question whether I should go get my estrogen levels checked or something.

Most recently, for instance,  I was at a fancy social event where a classy older lady (a relative) had to force herself from staring at my shoes while we conversed.  It was soon clear that she was smirking at my tights and sandal combination.

Still I remained stoic and nonchalant in my footwear choices.

Finally, a couple weeks ago I caught myself at the grocery store wearing Glen's oversized slippers and I decided then and there that it was time to go to a real store (any store besides the thrift store) and invest in something cute and fashionable.  If nothing else, so my kids will still be seen with me. 

So, here you go... 

 My new Sunday shoes.

...and my every day shoes.

I know. I know.

I rock.   



Denise said...

have i mentioned how much i wanna be like you when i grow up?

Meeks said...

you crack me up! I have JUST started getting new shoes! Before then I would use the shoes I bought before I was married...sad I know...

alexandra said...

Lara, your calves are NOT that big!

annalisa said...

Lara, you're hilarious!
I'm the exact same way in high heels. When I do happen to wear them I end up taking them off and carrying them.

Lara said...

Thanks Alex! You made my day! And Denise, I don't know how it's going to work since I'm always trying to be like you when I grow up. :)

Anonymous said...

It runs in the family-as I have exactly two pairs of shoes-my everyday shoes and my Sunday shoes

Both Pete and Nate have brought me new pairs of nice running/walking shoes, but I am such a creature of habit that I hardly ever wear them.

You are truly your father's daughter!

K said...

Thanks for the good laugh Lara. Where can I get myself a pair of those awesome furry shoes?

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