*The birth of sweet new babies. *A sick grandparent on their deathbed.
*A wedding of a daughter. *A teenage cancer friend who passed away tonight.
*A friend who lost a young daughter to AML a few months ago and now faces a terminal illness in her husband.
All of these are things that friends of mine are experiencing right now---in the last 24 hours--
and my heart is caught in this swirl of conflicting emotions of joy and heartbreak.
I grin at the pictures of the chubby cheeked newborn babies in the arms of their beaming parents and yet in the same moment cry tears of sadness for the friend who said goodbye to her sweet daughter tonight and another friend who prepares to say goodbye to her father-in-law.
The mother in me longs to make everything all better for everyone, just like when I could kiss my toddlers' booboos and magically make their troubles go away. Yet I know that against the crushing tide of grief, that my efforts alone will never be more than a mere bandaid on a gushing wound. I reach out in comfort, pray for them, and seek to relieve their suffering the best I can, but ultimately the peace that they long for has to come from within the chambers of their own heart....from God.
For God is the healer who can heal all wounds.
All of these happenings have led me to ponder on the ups and downs that life brings each of us and yearn to hold onto those ups better and stop dwelling on the downs. I want to learn to not only recognize better the beauty in the simple moments that can often go unnoticed in a day, but also to cultivate in my heart a greater capacity to savor those moments.
To rejoice with my daughter as a cute guy in her seminary class asks her to Mormon Prom.
To soak in the sun rays and truly enjoy the beauty of a glorious spring day.
To savor Ellie's joy at finally being able to ride a bike without fear of what will happen if she has a seizure. (she will stop pedaling, but not fall off or swerve into the street)
To let my heart soar in the realization that my kids truly enjoy being together.
And to watch with delight as Cami rallies the entire family, plus a few friends, to give them some lacrosse pointers!
This picture reminds me of the quote Ellie wrote in her notebook a few weeks ago:
"By ourselves we are strong. Together, with God, we are unstoppable."
I'm too tired to feel unstoppable most days, but I like to think that sagging energy and all, that with a renewed focus on my relationship with God and the things in life that matter most, that I can keep moving forward and making a difference
... one day at a time.
... one day at a time.
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1 comment:
Thank you! This post poignantly expresses the changing tides of life.
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