Holiday Gift Guide 2008

I'm always searching for fun, unique gifts for my family and so this year I thought I'd make a little guide and share with you some of my best finds! Each item contains a link to a site where you can place your order. I'm not too worried about spoiling anyone's surprises, since based on the number of comments they leave no one mentioned here actually reads my blog very often anyway.

1. For Pete and Mika:
Tired of Pictionary, Trivial Pursuit, and Monopoly? Here's a fun family game called "Gassy Gus" that's sure to entertain your family for hours. Players use food cards to force their opponents to pump Gassy Gus's head up and down. Each pump inflates his belly a little more, until finally Pete (oops I mean Gassy Gus) blasts gas. Nose plugs not included.

2. For Nate:
This essential kitchen gadget is perfect for the young singles on your shopping list. It brings new meaning to the word gourmet, taking the humblest of dinner foods and making it into a delectable delight--all without the use of a microwave! If you decide you need one of these inventive gifts for your family click here to order the pop-up hot dog cooker.

3. For Matt:
This classic gift is for the party animals on your list...you know the one who presses snooze 47 times each morning before getting up. Presenting the one and only tantrum throwing alarm clock! This little beauty pounds its fists and shouts for you to wake up in a whining voice (no it's not one of my kids for sale). And don't even think about pressing snooze--the more you press it, the louder and more annoying it gets.


4. For Kristina:
For the fitness enthusiast in your life. For me that would be my sister K. She has lost 50 lbs. in the last several months and even still she continues to be an inspiration to the rest of us with her daily work-out schedule! Feeding on her healthy zeal I just know that when she sees this product to help get her pet fish into shape too, that she will just be so excited that it might make her buy a pet fish.

Watch the video for a demo.




5. For Glen:
This gift is an essential item for the golfer in your life. Notice that this guy in the picture just looks like he's shining his club...but in actuality he's peeing straight into the hollow shaft of UroClub, a fake golf club designed by a board certified urologist! Never again will your golfer have to stealthily steal away to the woods for a little relief. It's discreet, sanitary, and easy to clean (his job, not mine). A woman's version is now being developed.
Hurry place your orders now...only 17 more days to go!

Sure cure for a bad day ...

Having a bad day? Ellie has the magic cure.

Ellie's version:

Cry, cry, and cry some more. Stop crying in 2 seconds flat when you lay eyes on your friend Bradford. Calmly suck your thumb through an entire concert.

Shriek in delight when you get to meet Dora.

Shyly meet Santa and Mrs. Claus and whisper repeatedly, "Polly Pocket. I want a Polly Pocket..."

Walk back in the door at home and pick up on the crying jag right where you left off.

Add in a little carrot cake and a nap and it's a guaranteed success.

It's going to be a long day...

How is it that every single one of my kids has woke up on the wrong side of the bed on the same day?

I shall not covet, I shall not covet, I shall not covet...

..I shall not covet that my neighbors that live a mere stone's throw away from us in the town limits get their leaves sucked up from the curbside by big, burly men in trucks...
while we spend hours and hours stuffing them all into expensive clear bags...
after hours and hours spent raking in the first place...
raking up a backyard so filled with trees that we can't even grow grass...

I sure hope that tenth commandment isn't important as the rest.

Golden Nuggets of Six-Year-Old Wisdom

Actual Conversation with Adam:
Adam: "Mom, some kids have been farting in my class at school."

Me: "We don't say 'fart' in our family. Could you please use 'toot' instead?"

Adam: "But they weren't tooting, they were farting."

Me (quizzically): "Huh? Is there a difference?"

Adam (in exasperation): "Yes! A toot is a smelly thing that comes from back there (pointing) and a fart is a noise you make with your armpits."

So there you have it...I learn something new every day.

Maid Service

Hired help is hard to find these days. Believe me I know. I've had the same cleaning team cleaning my house for the last decade or so, and after many years of ups and downs they just now have started to do a pretty reasonable job for the price [most of the time anyway].

Recently they had someone new join the cleaning team. I was a little skeptical at first when she came to me begging for a chance to scrub our hall bathroom, but when she told me her price I decided it wouldn't hurt to give her a try.

Imagine my surprise when this newbie jumped right in scrubbing the toilet, shining the sink, and scrubbing the floor without any instruction or complaint.

Her hard-work, enthusiasm, and cute accent won me over instantly and so it was with visions of a sparkling house that I hired the young lady on the spot!

Don't even bother calling...she's too busy cleaning our house.

I Feel My Savior's Love--Emma's Baptism Day

In addition to a fridge-less Thanksgiving spent with loved ones, we also had a very special occasion this weekend...Emma's baptism day.

So as not to inundate the blog with 40,000 photos of the day, I've compiled a few of our favorites into a short slide show with Emma's musical number as the soundtrack.

Wasn't that so pretty? I'm so glad that Emma inherited her musical abilities from Glen's side of the family.

Thanks to all of you who shared in our special day--Heather (all the way from MN), Pete & Mika (& family), Aaron & Trish (& Sylvie), Marilyn, and many wonderful friends. We are grateful for your love and support. And for those of you too far to come, we are grateful for your love from afar!

Help me Mr. President...

I need a presidential turkey pardon granted--PRONTO !

May you have a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with lots of love, yummy food, and laughter! --gobble, gobble!

The Wrath of Old Mother Hubbard

Old Mother Hubbard

Went to the fridge,

To give the poor children some milk:

When she came there,

The fridge was bare,

And so the poor kids had none.

Two days before Thanksgiving and my fridge looks like this! Grrrr.




And what about my oven?
Sure it's ugly, I'll give you that.

But when I went to the parts store today to get a new element for it they had to look up its model number on MICROFICHE! Remember those old things we used to do genealogy on? Apparently my oven falls into the "ancestor" file and it's still going strong, while our 3 year old fridge needs a new motor! Grrrr again!

Old Mother Hubbard

Went into Sears,

To give the workers a piece of her mind:

When she came there,

She kicked their behind,

And now the workers are scared.

HEHE! I always think I'm so hilarious at 11pm.

Stake Conference Defined

Stake conference /steɪk/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [steyk][kon-fer-uhns]:
--noun

1. an official assembly of clergy and laity, in a division of ecclesiastical territory, consisting of a number of wards presided over by a president and two counselors.

2. a time for wiping noses, propping up nodding heads, continually searching for something new and interesting to do that may have grown in the bag, trying to make room for two kids on my lap, stopping near constant squabbles over who had more right to my lap over the other, a child who kept singing along with the choir, calming a panicked child whose fingernail finally ripped off after hanging on by a thread for weeks, trying hard to keep the kids' antics from injuring the elderly women sitting next to us, lamenting not bringing snacks...

3. The longest two hours of my life!!!!

Happy Birthday Kristina!

Turn up your volume and click on play in the box below for your very own super duper Crain family happy birthday rendition!

Gabcast! The Golden Seven #1




Um, yeah. Go ahead and tell us how awesome we are for recording this from three different states and how you totally want me to release it as a single so you can buy it on itunes...

...you know I totally would do it too. I'm all about appeasing the masses you know.

We love you K! Happy birthday!!

PS When is the next America's Got Talent audition?

A Boycott and a New Tradition!

So each year the week before Thanksgiving rolls around and all the parents are invited to school to join their kids for a special Thanksgiving lunch--turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, you know the drill. Normally my kids completely refuse to take hot lunches other than when pizza is on the menu [chalk it up to their good taste...ha!], but for whatever reason they always insist on trying the Thanksgiving lunch.

So year after year I choke up the $3.40 and join the kids in eating the chewy, flavorless memories of my own childhood lunches...leaving the school feeling unsatisfied, gypped, and still hungry.

This year I was feeling rebellious [and hungry], so I decided on a new family tradition...
a quick stop at Subway for a sweet-onion chicken teriyaki to share with the kids. A win-win-win for everyone [a win for each of the three meals I ate at the school that day].

Now that's a tradition I can stick with!

Was It Supposed to Be THAT Hard?

Remember this from a month ago?


After 29 days of being the mailman's worst enemy,
one trip to Home Depot,
one broken shovel,
4 trips to Lowes ,
countless stripped screws,
one busted pair of pliers (from pulling out stripped screws),
my first experience pouring cement,
1-1/2 hours with my neighbor as he tried to help me attach the cross arm,
two arguments with Glen,
a toolbox that now feels way more loved by me than by its rightful owner (see previous statement),
a whole bunch of these as de-stressing food [click here for recipe]... one super goofy picture taken by my sister...
and VOILA!
The prettiest mailbox on the block!!! WOOHOO!

Something tells me that it wasn't supposed to be quite that hard.

Post-Marathon Tradition

What's the best thing to do (besides sleeping) after the mental and physical exhaustion of running 13 or 26 miles?

Going to visit with an old friend that was willing to feed our insatiable appetites and be patient with our refusal to walk up or down stairs! Chelsey used to live nearby us here in the area, but has since moved on with her cute family to a beautiful home in Richmond. Chelsey is the responsible party for getting me hooked on stamping and card making!

Cami and Whitney hadn't seen each other in a couple of years, but were giggling, talking, and cooking together in no time!

Don't ask me what it was that Cami and Whitney made--all I know is that it had loads of sugar, corn syrup, and artificial coloring. Perhaps a little lacking in the nutrition department, but Ellie and Brinley were oblivious to that fact and thought they were the coolest treats ever!


Adam and Tyler were like old friends in no time glued to the video games.

Even Glen and Aaron picked right back up where they left off...watching the BYU game! It was good that the Cougs ended up winning, otherwise we may have had to leave early. : )


Good friends like the Gregory's are hard to come by and I am truly grateful for their friendship over the years. We left their presence feeling energized by their contagious enthusiasm about the things in life that truly matter and inspired by their courage and faithfulness through the very difficult times they have endured recently.

Now we just need to figure out a way to see them other than just before or after running the Richmond marathon. Really we don't smell/eat/walk like that all the time!