Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Random Weirdness

A few years ago, I had an elderly woman in a thick German accent  corner me in an elevator and praise me for having such fair-haired and fair-skinned children.   She went on to lament how infrequently she saw such beautifully fair children and reaffirmed how thrilled she was to see mine that day.  More than a little awestruck at the boldness of her use of the word "fair-skinned", I muttered some semblance of a thank you and got off the elevator quickly she could heil Hitler and show me her Nazi armband. 

It was weird and sad all at the same time. 

Although weird moments like that one tend to be few and far between, lately it seems like we've been running into more than our fair share.  Take these recent instances: 

  • Listening to the radio on the way home one day, I  hear the DJ announce a contest where the winner would receive $100 and a dozen Georgetown Cucpakes.  I am stopped in traffic and decide that I'm going to call and try to win.  Weirdly enough I got through the first time I called and they start asking me my name, where I'm from, etc.  I am so excited, until they mention that in order to win the prizes, I have to win a trivia duel with one of the announcers.  Right before we're about to go on the air to play the game,  I conveniently remember how utterly horrible I am at Trivial Pursuit.  I suddenly know that, consolation prize or not, that I was about to make a big fool of myself in front of the whole world.   Wishing I had time to flash through to my sister, Heather, I panic, tell them I don't want to play anymore and hang up.   My family still wants me to bring them some Georgetown Cupcakes as a consolation for having such a weird mother! 
  • We were crossing a busy street the other day when some guy rolled down his window and started screaming at us about how much Obama had messed up the world.   "Who's gonna pay for the trillions of dollars of debt that Obama's racked up in the last four years?  Who?!  What are YOU going to do about all that debt?..."  and on and on.    We were a little amused by this roadside political tirade, but the kids were totally freaking out at his loud and contentious tone of voice, so we kept on walking. 
  • Stopped at a stoplight  with their windows down, some random guy questioned Spencer and Cami tonight as to whether they knew where the jail was, because he needed to go turn himself in. 
  • I totally get car-induced narcolepsy, but check out this guy we followed for 10+ miles on the beltway without so much as a stir....  We could see him breathing, otherwise would have considered calling the cops. 
  • Then there's the top-hatted guy driving a convertible we see regularly on the way from seminary to school.  No picture yet, although Spencer is determined to capture it soon. 
  • And what may be the weirdest tidbit of all....

    {SIDENOTE: My facebook friends can stop reading now as this will be repetitive, but I know that if I don't get the pics onto the blog, they won't end up in my yearly blog books and will likely be lost forever.}
My absurd inability to see or even talk about a dam without spewing at least one dam joke.  Usually several (or a whole facebook album).    Normally not much of a swearer, my family is bemused by the fact that I find using "dam" as an adjective in front of everything remotely dam related to be wildly funny.  

Take this path for instance.  To you it looks like any other random woodland trail.

But look closer and you will see that that very same path takes you right in front of the dam, therefore it cannot be called a mere woodland trail anymore.  It is a dam trail. 

And standing in front of the dam, my family becomes cute dam family.  Or if that sounds a little  awkward, my dam cute family. 

And when Ellie starts acting all sweet and adorable for the camera, she becomes a dam cute girl...

And just plain dam adorable....

And lest you think that I get to escape being in any dam I am... dam gray hairs and all....

Thank goodness my family is so dam understanding...
and they know that dam jokes are only allowed in the presence of a dam.  And that only mommy is allowed to use the other variation. 

PS  I promise not to visit any dams again for at least another year. 


The McArthur Family said...

Hmmm. It's a tie. Is my favorite the guy in the wheelbarrow or the one asking directions to the jail? Seriously.

K said...

Those are some crazy dam stories. I especially like the guy sleeping in the truck. Can't imagine that's legal. Just saying.

Steve-Rosanna said...

We must report that we are universally dismayed about your hang-up on the radio station trivia contest. You are certainly more competitive than to meekly hang up- all totally anonymously.

And thank you Dr. Wawa for finally pinpointing the accurate diagnosis for the mystery ailment plaguing your mom for decades: car narcolepsy. Seconds after fastening her seat belt and the car starts-she is asleep.

We have also concluded that you are pretty dam puny Wawa!

Steve said...

Next to last word should've read "punny" and not "puny".

April said...

Seriously, Lara, I'm cry laughing a little right now. Thanks for making me smile.

April said...

Seriously, Lara, I'm cry laughing a little right now. Thanks for making me smile.

April said...

Just showed it to Nate and he said it was "dam funny"

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