A year ago today (May 31) Spence busted out of the hospital once and for all....
At that point I thought the hard part was over. But I was wrong.
Everything about leukemia was out of our control. Him getting it was out of our control. His treatment was out of our control. And whether or not the treatment was successful was out of our control. All we had to do was pray and support him the best way we knew how.
Then he came home and suddenly everything seemed to shift back to us. The doctors told us that his chance for relapse was quite high, so we've found ourselves celebrating each milestone with a somewhat reserved enthusiasm and a pervading worry about whether we are doing enough to "help" him stay healthy.
Much to Spence's own chagrin (and teenage appetite) that worry has led me to keep adding things to the list of what we need to change to keep him healthy. We've thrown away all of our plastic dishes, I stopped buying processed meats, banished artificial colors and sweeteners, started baking our bread, grinding wheat, and I still sometimes wonder if we should move further away from the freeway. And yet deep down I worry that it's all too little, too late and can't help but wonder if anything would be different if only I had started all this sooner.
Glen has felt the same helplessness that I have since the end of Spencer's treatment, but has battled it in a much different way than me. Instead of selfishly just trying to keep it away from our family like I have, he has chosen to battle against leukemia by putting his heart and soul into finding a cure. He has tirelessly fundraised over $10,000 all the while training for a marathon, which he ran in March. Now he is in NY for a 108-mile bike ride which he will ride in the morning.
It seems only apt that he is riding to find a cure, the day after Spencer's anniversary for being cured.
I think we will celebrate big with some homemade bread and organic peaches....and maybe some ice cream!
Go Glen! Yay Spence!
Everything about leukemia was out of our control. Him getting it was out of our control. His treatment was out of our control. And whether or not the treatment was successful was out of our control. All we had to do was pray and support him the best way we knew how.
Then he came home and suddenly everything seemed to shift back to us. The doctors told us that his chance for relapse was quite high, so we've found ourselves celebrating each milestone with a somewhat reserved enthusiasm and a pervading worry about whether we are doing enough to "help" him stay healthy.
Much to Spence's own chagrin (and teenage appetite) that worry has led me to keep adding things to the list of what we need to change to keep him healthy. We've thrown away all of our plastic dishes, I stopped buying processed meats, banished artificial colors and sweeteners, started baking our bread, grinding wheat, and I still sometimes wonder if we should move further away from the freeway. And yet deep down I worry that it's all too little, too late and can't help but wonder if anything would be different if only I had started all this sooner.
Glen has felt the same helplessness that I have since the end of Spencer's treatment, but has battled it in a much different way than me. Instead of selfishly just trying to keep it away from our family like I have, he has chosen to battle against leukemia by putting his heart and soul into finding a cure. He has tirelessly fundraised over $10,000 all the while training for a marathon, which he ran in March. Now he is in NY for a 108-mile bike ride which he will ride in the morning.
It seems only apt that he is riding to find a cure, the day after Spencer's anniversary for being cured.
I think we will celebrate big with some homemade bread and organic peaches....and maybe some ice cream!
Go Glen! Yay Spence!
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| This is the senior ad I created for his HS yearbook. |
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