A Funeral, an Injury, and Another Unexpected Trip

A few weeks ago, my grandmother, Doris/Nana, passed away.   She was 96-years-old and had been super healthy and energetic up until just the last couple of years.  She lived in my parents' basement for about a decade and just moved to a care facility a few miles from our home after my Dad passed away in 2022.   Having her live with my parents meant I got to know her better than I ever could while she'd lived in Oklahoma City for all the years before.  

I got to know what an amazing cook she was...always offering to feed us...even in the last couple weeks of her life.   Her specialties were  hearty breakfasts, which usually consisted of bacon, eggs, homemade biscuits, and gravy.   Our family enjoyed many a delicious morning in Nana's lair while she spoiled us.   She is also very generous and always had a gift to offer to whomever came to visit her.  

My Dad was her oldest child (and I am the oldest child of my parents), so it was an amazing thing that we got a 5 generation shot before my Dad passed away.  It's not many people who get to meet their great-great grandchildren!   

She also got to meet Oliver...

   I felt blessed to be able to live close over the last few years, so I could drop by her care facility on a semi-regular basis.    I will never forget how she kept asking if we needed anything and wondering if she could make us some food up until the last week or two of her life.   

She had raised her family in Oklahoma City and lived there until about 2013 (?), when she came to live with my parents.    My granddad was buried there in OKC and it made sense to hold her funeral there in the city she called home for so many years. 

Four of my siblings and my mom were able to fly out to the funeral.  

  

It was amazing being able to see so many long lost cousins I hadn't seen in many years...  

And other extended family as well --aunts, uncles,  2nd cousins, and even Nana's 90-year-old sister {not shown}!

 I had arrived into town on Friday around  lunchtime and left just a few hours after the funeral was over on Saturday, so I could get back for my talk in sacrament meeting the next day.

We didn't have very long together, but I was grateful for the time we did have.   |

The day after the funeral, my Mom, sister, Heather, and brother, Matt, drove back to Dallas for their flights home.  Tickets in and out of Dallas were MUCH cheaper than from OKC, even with the car rental and hotel added in.  I almost certainly would have gone that route too, except I needed to get back for my talk.  It was there in Dallas my sister, Heather, had an epic fall on an uneven sidewalk at the hotel they were staying at.  It was a bad fall that involved a couple of broken bones, missing her flight home, and an emergency surgery the next day.  

Thus began a new crazy adventure that involved another surgery to remove all the crazy external hardware they placed to stabilize everything before the actual repair...

2+ weeks in the hospital and in-patient rehab center...

and some round robin trips to Dallas amongst us siblings to stay with her and help her out.    Matt took the first couple days, then AnnaLisa flew out, then I came for Monday to Friday....

And made sure to get myself and Heather some Torchy's a few times...

Then Kristina arrived later in the day I left to take the final shift and fly home with her (after a full two weeks of being stuck there)!   

IN amidst all this, we had to figure out how to get my Mom back home.  She was supposed to fly back with Heather, and since she gets easily disoriented, we knew there was no way she could navigate an airport by herself.   Eventually we arranged for to be accompanied straight to the gate in Dallas, then I met her in the airport in Provo, which thankfully is a very small airport.  

Mom was totally fine.   

Heather is now home.  

And life remains as off-beat as  a good plotline  for an  episode in Crazy Town!  

One of the Most Insane Months of My Life... (all words, no pictures)

We returned home from Hawaii on June 2nd and got busy adjusting to "normal" life again, but, alas, normal life has remained elusive.   In fact, I daresay that June 2022 may go down as one of the absolute craziest months of my entire life.  Read on to find out more....

On June 4th, we took my dad to the ER, where they diagnosed him with high calcium and some electrolyte imbalances, gave him IV fluids, then sent him home.  

On June 5th, we brought my dad back to the hospital for worsening symptoms, where he was admitted to the ICU for dangerously high calcium levels.    Over the course of the next few days (while we took turns with my mom and sisters sitting with Dad), the doctors decided that his lymphoma (which he was diagnosed with last year) was progressing in such a way that it was time to place him into hospice care.   😢

AND WITH THAT BEGAN THE ABSOLUTE INSANITY...

First, we had to deal with the array of emotions that came with that pronouncement, but there wasn't time to dwell on them, because we had to pick a hospice care company before they'd release him from the hospital.  We researched like crazy and asked friends, and ended up choosing a company called "Dignity Hospice".   The nursing supervisor for the company was in my previous ward and many friends had used them for their loved one's last days.   Almost a month later and I have to say that so far things are going pretty smoothly.  

THEN CAME THE SCRAMBLING TO... 

•  research funeral homes
•  figuring out how to tell family and friends
• navigating questions from the people we told
• trying to collect messages from loved ones around the world to present to my Dad on Father's Day. 

IN ADDITION....

1.  I was trying to help Adam get some mission shopping done before he took off to be an FSY counselor for most of the summer.  His counselor job started June 11th. 

2.  I was scrambling to help Ellie get ready for her 2-1/2 week long Humanitarian XP trip to Malawi, which started on June 14th.  

3.  I was hosting a bridal shower for a dear friend from Virginia on June 17th.  I had offered to do it weeks before all the Dad drama began.  

4.  I was hosting 10 people in my house  for about a week after my whole family decided to gather here in Utah for Father's Day, so they could spend time with my Dad while he still felt reasonably well.  

5.  I was helping to plan a Clarence and Rose Hepworth Family Reunion to be held June 18th.  I had a few helpers, but I was mostly in charge of planning the details, navigating questions and RSVPs, making flyers, and making sure that the details came together.     

6. I am the assistant stake camp director for YW camp that was held June 27 - July 1.  

IN OTHER WORDS...

My stress level has been sky high and I am completely and totally EXHAUSTED!!!!

BUT....

1.  My Mom and I toured three local funeral homes together, went over the pros and cons of each, and have one  picked out now. 

2.  We successfully told people about Dad's diagnosis and collected dozens of meaningful messages/memories, which we presented to him on Father's Day.  To be totally honest though....he  hardcore hated it and was mad at me for telling people he was dying, when he only had lymphoma...not cancer, like I was telling people. 😒 My feelings were hurt, but ultimately I remembered that I had felt prompted to gather the messages, and,  even if he never reads or appreciates them, we will be happy to have those messages/memories for our records.  

3. All 8 of us siblings came together for Father's Day weekend, we took family pictures, discussed some hard things, and enjoyed being able to spend time with Dad...except when he was mad at us (mostly me) and made me cry. 

4. I got a little mission shopping done with Adam (all of his white shirts, all of his ties, and a few pairs of pants).  We know what suit size he wears, he's tried on some raincoats, and we've narrowed down what shoes we're  going to buy.  He's also successfully completed his first 3 weeks as an FSY counselor (2 weeks in Fresno and 1 week in Provo).  He's completely physically, mentally, and spiritually exhausted, but he's happy.  He will be home with us for a week before he heads to Snow College for his last 3 weeks as a counselor.     Stay tuned for a blogpost coming soon...

5.  Ellie had a magnificent 2-1/2 week trip to Malawi. She is jet-lagged and also exhausted, but, like Adam,  is also very happy!  Stay tuned for a blogpost coming soon..

6. The bridal shower was successful.   They mostly took care of the food and decor, so most of the stress was getting my house clean enough to feel comfortable hosting 20ish people.   They ended up in the "guts of my house"  (digging in my pantry, opening drawers, etc) a little more than I expected, but it is what it is....me in all my glory!   And it ended up going well!  

7. The reunion went smoothly and I think everyone was happy about it. 
 

8. YW camp is over  and I survived.  I'm only functioning at about 66% today, but it's done, I met lots of awesome ladies and YW, and there were no major disasters, so I'm calling it a win!  Stay tuned for a blogpost coming soon...

I'm rooting for a quieter July, but I'm not getting my hopes up too high... 

Hawaii-- Part 10-- Coming Home!

I know I've teased that we were nearing the end of the Hawaii posts, but this is actually it.   THE LAST POST ABOUT OUR TRIP TO PARADISE....enjoy!  

WEDNESDAY JUNE 1

• We spent a lovely, lazy morning at the beach...then headed to the airport.

• We flew to LAX

• It took a while to get our luggage and get things figured out with the airport shuttle, and by the time we were all checked in, we were completely starved.   Most of the family headed out for a late night trip to In N Out that was near the hotel, but FUN FACT.... I do not do late night fast food no matter how hungry I am, so I opted to stay back and play with Lucie.    I'd rather go hungry than deal with the consequences of late night eating escapades.  

THURSDAY JUNE 2

• We woke up the next morning and all went our separate ways and when I say separate, I mean SEPARATE!!!

    🐟Glen flew to Portland for a fishing trip with colleagues. 

    👰Emma flew to DC for her best friend's wedding. 

    🌳Cami, Garrett, and Lucie flew to Birmingham for a beach week for Garrett's family, then to move into their apartment and start settling in for Garrett's residency. 

    🏠Spencer, Ellie, and I flew home to SLC where life got real immediately upon our arrival.  

• Stay tuned for more details to come...

Randomness from August

The problem with not blogging as regularly as I used to, is I get gummed up with lots of things I still want to blog about, but don't want to devote an entire post to.   I wonder if there will come a day when I give it up completely (or that I'll blog more regularly again), but for now, I see what a treasure this blog has been to my family and I am still drawn to keep it up at least on a minimal basis.   

So, I'm making this a random post with a little glimpse of August in the Goold house!  

Cami's mission started using Facebook to share the gospel and it's been fun to see her smiling face occasionally beaming out to us among the drivel that fills my normal Facebook feed!

My cute Ellie liked this sign at the grocery store! 

My dad had a stroke right after his birthday.  

The stroke was on the minor end of things as far as strokes go,  but he had to spend a few weeks in the hospital and rehab before he was allowed to come home, so it's been a tough time for him and my mom.   He's doing better than the doctors expected, but we were sad that it caused them to have to cancel their trip out to visit us in September.  I decided that was my cue to buy a ticket and go out to see them in a couple of weeks.   We are also heading there for Thanksgiving. 

When Emma packs food for a trip, she goes all out.  These are homemade Larabars she made.

We stopped by Busch Gardens on the way home from seeing the solar eclipse.  

We hadn't been in a couple of years and it was fun to have one last hurrah before school started again!

Me and my cute hunny! 

One day I noticed a little trail of blood all over the kitchen.  I totally got mad at the kids and demanded that they take care of whatever injury was leaving such a mess.   They all denied having any injuries, then randomly pointed out that my toe looked to be bleeding.  Oops!  I didn't feel a thing, but I had quite a little chunk of skin off the top of my baby toe and bled through several bandages (and made a much bigger mess before I finally got it under control)! 

A white dove hung out around our house for an entire day.  I had never seen one in the wild before and haven't seen one since, but I took it to be a good omen and a sign that we need to powerwash  our gutters. 

I found this cartoon when studying for my psychology class (that I'm teaching this year) and it totally struck my funny bone.  My dreams usually involve being unprepared for something and babies that I forget about.   

A random butterfly that we came across one day. 

And with that bit of randomness, I will declare myself officially caught up on blogging through August.   Now onto September! 

A Lump

June 10:
Today Glen had a "giant lipoma" removed from his back.

 Because of how large it was, the surgery had to be done in the hospital.

Lipomas are almost always benign, so the doctor isn't worried too much about it, but they are doing a biopsy on it just to be on the safe side.    The surgery took about an hour and while he was under I went to visit the pediatric hematology-oncology floor.   They recently built a brand new wing of the hospital and it's now on the tenth floor of the new wing.   I only ran into one familiar face (Holly from ChildLife).   It's crazy how much things change in four years.   

Between the surgery and the visit to the hem-onc floor, I was surprisingly worn out, and later forgot all about a birthday party that Ellie was  invited to.  Eventually (after a phone call from the mom of a girl I was supposed to pick up along the way)  I dropped her off late when I took Adam to his flag football game.  

It was a long day, but this sunset was a beautiful finish to the day.

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Riddle Answers (aka the Day of Stern Warnings)

I'm pretty sure no one would have ever gotten this riddle right unless you happen to live in our house, but  here are the answers to the few of you who might actually have been a little worried about us.  Thanks for your awesome guesses, H!   The offer still stands for whomever figures out how to rewind the clock to simpler days.  

THE RIDDLE:  
I started today in a courtroom, spent most of the rest of it at the hospital, and then just made a frantic 9:00pm mad dash to the grocery store for sugar and cream cheese. What was going on today?   


THE ANSWERS:  

1.  Why was I in a courtroom?   Cami had been served a summons (by a policeman showing up at our door) to go to court because of her traffic accident in August.    Monday was her day in court.   Thankfully the judge was kind to her, dismissed the charges, and sent her on her way with a very stern warning to be a better driver.

2.   Why did I spend most of the day at the hospital?  Glen almost passed out at church on Sunday (while bearing his testimony).   Because nothing like that had ever happened to him before, I took him to the ER to rule out anything serious going on.   The doctors immediately admitted him and spent about 30 hours performing a myriad of tests on him.   Everything (heart, lungs, blood, blood pressure, etc) all came back totally normal and he was finally released on Monday evening with a stern warning not to skip breakfast anymore.

One of the worst parts about the whole incident was that it happened very publicly, which is the only reason why I am even mentioning it here on the blog.  Not a ton of people noticed the incident actually happening, but then when the bishop called on Glen to comment in the third hour of church and we were already gone,  apparently one of my friends very frankly replied to everyone, "Glen almost passed out and Lara took him to the hospital."    That's when the texts and phone calls started like crazy.    

On the one hand, it was great to see the outpouring of love and concern for his wellbeing, but on the other hand, it was a tad embarrassing to have his little health scare so widely known.   We even had Glen's parents worriedly calling him from Colorado, because Glen's aunt, who is in our ward, had told them.   I opted not to tell my family until it was over, just to avoid unnecessarily alarming anyone else.  We figured a couple hundred worried people was plenty, at least until we knew whether there was something actually worthy of worry going on.

He is now feeling almost 100% and the only restrictions he was given, was to not use his right arm for two days because of a procedure they did to him.  The worst part about that is that means he can't drive, which means that yours truly is acting as chauffeur as he goes to and from work (20 miles each way).  I  actually really like the extra time I get to spend with him in the car, but I am already really, really sick of traffic.

3.   Why did I have to make a mad dash trip to the store for sugar and cream cheese at 9:00pm?   Cami had two big cupcake orders at the same time and did not realize until 9:00pm that we were totally out of sugar and cream cheese.   In a family that has a food storage, running out of a staple like sugar is almost unheard of.   Then again, if I were to try to have an entire year's supply of sugar in our house, it would probably take up an entire room.  With her cupcake business and all of children's predilection to baking, it's absolutely obscene how much butter, cocoa, eggs, sugar, and powdered sugar we go through at our house.     Thankfully it's not us eating all of it.

I was not very excited by the late night (by my standards) trip to the store and Cami ended the day with a stern warning to better stay on top of her ingredient supplies, so that I can replenish them when I'm grocery shopping anyway.  

Definitely Not Funny in Real Life

Remember Wile E. Coyote and all of his little "accidents"?  He'd fall off cliffs and get blown up like seventeen times an episode and everyone would laugh uproariously every time...


Well when Wile E. Coyote incidents happen in real life, they're not quite so funny. 


Like when you go out on your deck and step on a loose board and promptly get whacked in the face with the board, knocking you out briefly, and cutting so deep into your lips that the doctor has to stitch the muscle back together before stitching the skin. 

A tetanus shot, vicodin, penicillin, two lidocaine shots into the roof of his mouth,  and 7 stitches later he's feeling numb faced and a little woozy, but otherwise fine. 



And although he's not excited that it happened, we're both exceedingly grateful that by mere fractions of inches that:

a)  it did not damage any teeth
b) it did not touch his nose
c) it did not go all the way through to the outside of his lip.  According to the doctor it was very, very close to ripping all the way through. 
d) that it happened to him and not to one of the kids


Now if anyone has any helpful hints about redoing decks as inexpensively as possible, please let us know.  Ours will be out of commission for a while. 

The offending board.
This is the end he stepped on, which got pushed downward causing  his leg to fall  through
as the other end of the board swung up and hit him in the lip. 

Normal (?) Life

A couple of weeks ago I daydreamed about post-hospital life with great longing.  I was simply busting at the seams to be out of the hospital and to go back to being normal again. 

Too bad I didn't remember that being normal in June means 247 things to do on the calendar each week.  Between end-of-school-year awards ceremonies (at both schools), band concert (Emma), strings concert (Cami), invasive dentist appointments (Glen), choir concert (Emma), piano recital (Emma),  nightly swim practice (Emma and Adam), end-of-year parties (Ellie, Adam, Emma),  sports award ceremony (Cami), helping Cami launch her summer cupcake business (email me if you want a flier), routine doctor check-ups (Cami and Emma),  youth conference fireside (Spencer and Cami), seminary advancement fireside (Spencer and Cami), a seventy mile relay race (Glen), the 22-mile walk to the temple (Emma and Cami)....

all the while trying to get back into the exercising routine, helping the kids to be somewhat social, preparing for family to arrive this weekend, digging out of our laundry piles, and taking Spencer to his check-ups....

I think I'm looking forward to the kids being out of school as much, if not more than,  they are.

*****************************

And for your entertainment....

I hereby present Spencer and cousins' hospital outtakes

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"Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo Da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein."                             Unknown

but I bet none of them had five kids...

Wonderfulness

Life is good.  Spencer is feeling great and we're loving being all back together again.  Spencer had a check up at the clinic this morning and was declared A-okay!  His ANC is only 180 now, which in past times would have meant that we would still be at the hospital, so we are extra grateful for the docs allowing him to recover here at home.  He goes back to the clinic next Tuesday for another checkup and then his bone marrow biopsy is scheduled for the 18th. 

Just for fun, we were trying to come up with a list of things that we missed about hospital life and hard as we tried we were mostly drawing blanks.  By the end of our stay we had grown so weary of hospital life that we could only come up with three things that we legitimately miss about hospital life. 

1. The perfectly crunchable ice cubes.

2. The frequent visits from friends and loved ones (a post for another day).

3. And the wonderful nurses. 

                                              (Laura, Meghan, Lisa, Spencer, Jessica, Brooke, Becca, Kristin)

they came with unfailing smiles (even in the wee hours of the morning)...

(Jessica)

they laughed and joked with Spencer...

                  (Fatmatta and Shineca)                                                                                               (Brooke)   
              
they lent him postcards and other paraphernalia to get him even more excited  about his potential Make-A-Wish destination...

(Meghan)

they oohed and ahhed over his sweet card tricks...

(Erica, Jessica, Meghan, Fatmatta)

they played countless games with him to pass the time...

(Holly--the Child Life Specialist)

they lent him books to read....

(Kristin)

they patiently explained procedures to us and put up with our myriads of questions....

                                  (Becca)                                                                                                          (Gabi)

and they inspired a little girl to dream big....

(a wannabe Gabi)

They took wonderful care of Spencer and we consider our association with these amazing ladies as one of the greatest blessings of Spencer's experience in the hospital.

  (Cristi, Kristin, Spencer, Becca)

Thank you Inova Fairfax pediatric oncology nurses!