Thursday, January 1, 2015

christmas cards!


Before I lose track of it, which happens more quickly than I would like to admit, here is our (unedited) Christmas letter and card.  

What can I say?   

It's another super long epistle filled with TMI and questionable humor, which I guess means that it about suits us perfectly.    


New Super Abridged 2014 Dictionary
Fully Revised and Updated

Lar-a (lahr-uh), n. - 1. a woman who enjoys homeschooling three of her children, serving the Young Women at church, and posting things on her blog (see 2. a goofy woman who finds it wildly funny to visit dams for the sole purpose of making dam jokes.  (ex. I wonder if that fisherman [standing on the dam]  has caught any dam fish yet.)  3.  a person who’s been known to pretend she’s at a dam whilst schlepping kids around through the DC traffic.  4.  a lady who deactivated all her social media accounts (Facebook and Instagram) this year and likes people and life much better now.

Glen (glĕn), n. - 1. a hard working husband and father who works at a small engineering firm that designs and produces meteorological equipment. 2. one who spent most of the year serving as the beloved primary chorister at church  3. a person who rolls his eyes at dam jokes. 4. an out-of-shape  athlete beginning the process of thinking about training for a century bike ride and triathlon this summer. 5.   After rocking  a bacon-wrapped turkey complete with bacon infused gravy for Thanksgiving, he is also known as the new family turkey chef.
- verb  to cheer enthusiastically for every single BYU game, no matter the  sport.  (ex. Where’s Dad?  He’s downstairs glenning for BYU’s golf team going against Southeast Montana State.)

Spen-cer (spĕn sur), n. - 1. a 19-year-old boy who still doesn’t like fajitas, buttons (see enclosed picture), or pictures being taken of him.   2. a hard-working student at James Madison University (in Harrisonburg, VA) who is in process of changing his major. 3. a young man thrilled to be 2-½ years in remission from leukemia!
- verb  to sleep for double digit hours whenever one crosses the threshold of home.  
(ex. We’re leaving; where is your brother?   Oh, he’s just spencering again and said not to wake him up until after lunchtime.)

Cam-i (căm ē), n. - 1. a 17-year-old senior at High School who strongly hopes to be a BYU student in the fall. 2. the girl who counted down the days to receiving her driver’s license, then within a couple weeks after receiving it totalled the car.  3.  an entrepreneurial teen who is on her third successful year of having her own cupcake business, also an in-demand babysitter  and math tutor.  4.  person known for getting by on little sleep.
- adj.  really, really, really long hair  (ex. Mom, may I go jump rope with that girl’s cami hair?)

Em-ma (ĕm uh), n. - 1. a high energy 14-year-old girl loving her first year of being homeschooled.  2.  a piano playing opera singer, who is the only of our children to ever practice their music willingly.  3. a baker extraordinaire who loves trying to make sweet treats healthier by taking out the refined sugars and/or grains. (NOTE: chocolate does not count as sugary)
- verb  to  play the piano so frequently that your parents sometimes get mad at you.  (ex. People are sleeping and you’ve already practiced for 2 hours, please stop emma-ing the piano!)

Ad-am (ăd umm), n. - 1.  a 12-year-old boy who finds being forced to wear long pants to be worse than any form of medieval torture. (see enclosed picture that was taken in 40º weather)  2.  fishing derby grand champion.   3.  eager participant on Lego League robot team, where he learned to program the EV3 robot to perform cool tasks, like spinning in endless circles.   4.  Avid board game player. (his favorites:  Settlers of Catan, Telestrations, 10 Days in Africa)  
- adj. very gifted at teasing siblings.     (ex. MOM!   He keeps hiding my toys while I’m having  a seizure and I don’t like it!  Can you tell him to stop adamming me?) --hehe, it says dam!    

El-lie (ĕll ē), n. - 1. a 9-year-old girl  who loves her dolls, as well as the stealthy Elf on the Shelf we reluctantly acquired last year.  2. a girl who has finally developed a love for reading (Thank you, JK Rowling!)  3. a happy, creative student who was not being served well by the public schools and the reason why I will continue to homeschool for the foreseeable future.   4.  a surprising appreciator of Mom’s dam jokes.  
-verb  to readily befriend complete strangers--young and old, human and canine. (ex. While on vacation, Ellie was known to stop people everywhere we went and ellie with them, often carrying on conversations for upwards of 10 minutes with complete strangers.)

o-ver-joyed (ō vər joid), adj. 1. feeling great joy or delight 2. How we feel when we think of the birth of our Savior, the blessings God has given us, of family and friends, Spence’s continued health, and especially the knowledge of the gospel and the atonement.  

We-wish-you-a-Mer-ry-Christ-mas (wē wĭsh ū ə mer rē krĭs məs), phrase. 1. and a Happy New Year!

Previous years
2008: card
2009: We sent a WANTED poster that I have no record of.
2010: card and letter

1 comment:

Rachel said...

we laughed and laughed. Great letter!

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